1. You enjoy each other’s company, you want to be with the other person
2. You would say that you two are each other’s best friends
3. There is an intimate level of bonding and trust
4. You want to do things for the other person. you would happily go out of your way or make sacrifices for the other person, and you know that the other person feels the same way
5. After conflicts or arguments, you two are able to “make up” and there is no lingering hurt or bitterness about the fight
6. You feel loved, respected, and appreciated by the other person
7. There is a happy balance of “together time” and time away from each other. both of you are happy with how often the other person goes out with friends. both of you are ok with the amount of time you spend on interests or activities outside of the relationship (like sports, social gatherings, or videogames that the other person does not engage in)
8. You two know what is going on in each other’s lives, like what has been on their mind, what are they excited about lately, what are they frustrated about lately
9. You can turn to the other person for support, they are understanding. they give caring, thoughtful feedback that is helpful to you
10. You two know how to interact with each other’s friends or family, and are comfortable going to gatherings or functions together. you don’t necessarily love those people, but you do not say or do things that would put your partner in an awkward position  with their friends or family

Elvina Lui, M.A., MFT